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Unplugged
Prisoner: "Tell us how you cut him."Brilliant, and just what I need after today's 6-hour perfect storm of management meetings left me like a vegetable.
Billy Ray: "Hey, I didn't cut him with no knife, man."
Prisoner: "But you told me last night you cut the dude."
Billy Ray: "It was with these I cut him (shows hands). I am a chang belt in Kung Fu. Bruce Lee was my teacher. Watch this. Woop! HAA! Agai! Woop! Woop! Agai! Ayahhhh! Woop! Iguh! Hiya! Woo! Woo! Ha! Ha! Woop! Agai! Bin! Ha! Haaaaaaaaaa... Watah! Tidah! That's called the quart of blood technique. You do that, a quart of blood will drop out of a person's body.
Labels: Movies
Usability in the Movies
Break into a company -- possibly in a foreign country or on an alien planet -- and step up to the computer. How long does it take you to figure out the UI and use the new applications for the first time? Less than a minute if you're a movie star. The fact that all user interfaces are walk-up-and-use is probably the single most unrealistic aspect of how movies depict computers. In reality, we know all too well that even the smartest users have plenty of problems using even the best designs, let alone the degraded usability typically found in in-house MIS systems or industrial control rooms.
Labels: Movies
Advent Rant
The Beeb have created a Kermode review advent calendar. The Da Vinci Code rant is fun, but it's the controlled wrath directed at Little Man that intrigues. For a Wayans brothers' comedy, I'm intrigued to know how it could be so 'downright evil'.Labels: Movies
Cosmo flips
The comic actor Michael Richards, better known as Cosmo Kramer in the long-running TV show Seinfeld, has apologised for a racist outburst that was captured on film and broadcast across the US. Richards, 57, took exception when some black audience members talked during his act at a Los Angeles comedy club on Friday. In the recording, Richards says from the stage: "Fifty years ago we'd have you upside down with a fucking fork up your ass."Watch the rant (YouTube) | Read the article (Guardian)
Labels: Movies
The Aristocrats!
The Aristocrats is a joke that has been told by numerous stand-up comedians since the vaudeville era. Steven Wright has likened it to a secret handshake among comedians, and it is seen as something of a game in which those who tell it try to top each other in terms of shock value. It is rarely told the same way twice, often improvised, and was the subject of a 2005 documentary film of the same name. Throughout its long history, it has evolved from a clichéd staple of vaudevillian humor into a postmodern anti-joke.Find out more - including a sample telling of the joke - on Wikipedia. Warning: PG (Parental guidance) rating - guide your parents elsewhere!
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Mo' Better Billboard

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Surprise Delivery
It spotted it when I was waiting to pick up a Chinese last Saturday and flicking through the local rag on the counter. The massively difficult entry question was "How many films are there in the 5 DVD Spike Lee box set?" The question kinda suggests the audience demographic here in SK2 so I figured 'Why not?'; hardly likely to be overwhelmed by entries.
The full breakdown of the booty in the Spike Lee Joint Collection is as follows;
- Do the Right Thing
- Mo' Better Blues
- Jungle Fever
- Crooklyn
- Clockers
Labels: Movies
Snakes on a plane!
At one point, the film's working title was altered to 'Pacific Air Flight 121'. A perturbed Samuel L. Jackson told an interviewer, "We're totally changing that back. That's the only reason I took the job: I read the title." In another interview Jackson claimed that once he learned about the movie title being changed he said: "What are you doing here? It's not Gone with the Wind. It's not On the Waterfront. It's Snakes on a Plane!" The film was soon reverted to the working title of 'Snakes on a Plane'.In our house, snakes are right up there with rats and wolves as emblems of excitement, so we've immediately taken to using the phrase around the house anytime sudden exclamation is required. Toast burning? Snakes on a plane! Cherry cakes in the fridge? Snakes on a plane!
I was therefore intrigued to read that others are as thrilled we are, and that the phrase is entering the language from other directions, too. Check out other hilarious definitions of 'Snakes on a Plane' at Urban Dictionary.
Labels: Movies
Spoilt for Choice
"Old Trafford, 12/9/70, as a middling Manchester United beat Coventry, eight 16mm cameras were trained by a German experimental filmmaker on United's number 11: the legendary George Best. Shot, edited and framed so that hardly any other players are visible, Best's beauty on the pitch is captured forever. In the year of his death, surely there can be no better tribute."However, the current plan for this weekend - alongside Ice Age 2 later today - is to see if Dad wants to go along to Printworks tonight to check out the new film about the rise of New York Cosmos, Once in a Lifetime. Give me 1970s New York over 1960s Manchester anytime, George Best's brilliance notwithstanding.
And the two degrees of Kevin Bacon? According to today's Guardian, Pele was actually approached by United around that time;
"Pele belatedly revealed that he turned down an offer to join the club in the year of their first European Cup success. The most famous sporting icon on the planet claimed he was given the chance to team up with George Best, Denis Law and Bobby Charlton in what would have been the most formidable attacking line-up of any squad in history." More...
Labels: Movies
Da Bomber
Spike Lee's next film will be a biopic of the 1930s heavyweight boxing champion Joe Louis starring Terrence Howard, according to US reports. Lee told a university audience in Detroit that he planned to begin work on a film about the man known as the Brown Bomber after he finishes work on the Hurricane Katrina documentary which he is currently completing.
Labels: Movies
Marketing Brokeback
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The Son of Man(c)
The "contemporary retelling" of Jesus' last hours will begin with the messiah - who is yet to be cast - singing the Robbie Williams hit Angels, which will mark his procession into Jerusalem. The climax of the event sees Jesus sing the Smiths classic song Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now as he is being flayed by Roman soldiers. Read more
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Live and Direct
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Mr Vampire 2
Opinions differed on the female character in the film, a naive, closeted preacher's daughter who has to be saved from the unwanted attentions of her fiancee's depraved brothers. I was rather chuffed to be the only person who had seen any other Peckinpah films - Bring me the head of Alfredo Garcia and Straw Dogs - and was able to point out the use of sexual violence in all three works, sparking a short discussion about how Peckinpah's misogyny divides audiences.
After a short break spent hovering over cut-price sushi for Jo in the nearby Sainsbury's wandering whether to chance its freshness for a couple more hours, we finished up on genre by looking at horror; vampire films to be exact.
The lecturer - Andy Willis of Salford University - did a clever thing here, and as a trainer I was full of admiration. First we watched a clip of Dracula from the 50s with Christopher Lee and spent ten minutes focussing on the iconography - garlic, crosses, virgins, bats. Then we were told we were going to watch an unnamed modern vampire movie, and were again invited to predict. The inevitable guessing included Lost Boys, Blade and Buffy, but it turned out to be Mr Vampire 2, a goofy Chinese vampire film; not what we were expecting at all.
It was a brilliant move, elegantly highlighting the culture-specific dimension of genre and finishing the session with a flourish.
Labels: Movies
Out of Order
If you're unfamiliar, it's a NY cop drama and Mr T (sic) is one of the cops. Just. As the main character of colour, he is only ever used in a limited and stereotyped way;
- ...as the undercover cop (often posing as a drug dealer to trick his homies).
- ...to provide Ebonics-to-English translation.
- ...for passing on the the 'word on the street'.
I guess this would bother me a lot less if it wasn't such a fall from grace - Copkiller to Huggy Bear in about a decade.
Labels: Movies
Bamboozled
Spike Lee's Bamboozled (2002) is the cinematic equivalent of getting hit over the head with a baseball bat. It stops you in your tracks. It involves a smart, slick, black TV exec who has to come up with something new and 'more black'. Intending to undermine his bosses intentions, he creates a Minstrel-type review called Mantan with every racist cliche you can imagine; blackface, slaves, watermelon patches and more. Unfortunately the show becomes a huge hit...
One of Lee's points is that black Americans are partly responsible for perpetuating racist stereotypes; I noticed that it was black audience members initially reacting positively to Mantan. Later on there's also a faux commercial for a liquor called 'Da Bomb'. Even the bottle is missile-shaped and the ad could easily be a gangster rap video with the hip-hop, bling and booty-shakin'. Spike takes aim and ... BOOM!
The most unsettling scene for me is a pastiche of cultural appropriation where the black warm-up MC, dressed as Uncle Sam, hops about amongst the significantly white audience - who by this point in the film are ALL coming to the show in blackface - theatrically screaming at each and savouring every syllable, "IS YOOOOOU A NIG-GERRRRR?". A middle-aged Jewish woman shrieks with delight as it drips from his lips; it's chilling. BOOM!
No other film I can immediately think of provokes fascination and discomfort in equal measure. Only Spike Lee could do this, and only Spike Lee could get away with it.
NB: Lee is planning a new documentary about the handling of Hurricane Katrina:
No stranger to controversy, Lee has already stated his suspicion that the authorities were somehow involved in the flooding.
Labels: Movies
DVD Rental
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Film Studies
Tonight, however, is the first full course screening; Sam Peckinpah's Western, Ride the High Country. The 'homework' was to consider our expectations of the genre in advance of the screening, so I watched a Channel 5 stock western over the weekend to get the schema going;
SETTINGS
- One-horse town (saloon, hotel, barbershop)
- Ranch or farm
- US South-west/Mexico
- Fort
- Railroad
- Prairie, mountains, plains, desert
- Environment hostile and threatening
- Indian attack
- Chase
- Double-crossing
- Fistfight
- Shootout
- The ride west
- Gold rush
- Hero - male, white, 30s-40s, strong but silent, fights for good, brave, loner, itinerant, prevails through violence
- Villain - indians, outlaw dressed in black, landowners, bandits.
- Women - Good women: weak, pure, domesticated, needing protection, shown in soft focus. Bad women - town whore, busty, kind-hearted but immoral.
- Stranger in town
- Gambler
- Town drunk
- Sheriff
- Cavalry
- Vengeance
- Justice
- Small man vs the government
- Good vs evil
- Threat of 'other' (e.g. indians)
- USA defending the world
- Moral decay
- Individualism
- Urban vs rural
- Modern vs traditional
Labels: Movies
Sideways
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The Curse of the Were-Rabbit
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Strange Love
The irresistible force met the immovable object when Stanley asked George to do over-the-top performances of his lines. He said it would help George to warm up for his satiric takes. George hated this idea. He said it was unprofessional and made him feel silly. George eventually agreed to do his scenes over-the-top when Stanley promised that his performance would never be seen by anyone but himself and the cast and crew. But Kubrick ultimately used many of these 'warm-ups' in the final cut. George felt used and manipulated by Stanley and swore he would never work with him again.
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The Motorcycle Diaries
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Own Goal
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The Fog
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Baghdad é Bella
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Shine On
In his hands, it became a saccharine comedy about a writer struggling to find his muse and a boy lonely for a father. Gilding the lily, he even set it against 'Solsbury Hill', the way-too-overused Peter Gabriel song heard in comedies billed as life-changing experiences, like last year's 'In Good Company'.Update: Guardian Film article on how to manipulate a movie poster campaign when desperate for decent comments...
Watch the trailer (.mov)
Labels: Movies
Howl's Moving Castle
Hayao Miyazaki is the 64-year-old Japanese animation genius whose mastery of the form has, through a piquant turn of fate, come to its full flowering just as his craft is on the verge of becoming forever obsolete. I came relatively late to his rich, kaleidoscopic fantasies, having been baffled but intrigued by his Princess Mononoke, and then utterly bowled over by his great movie Spirited Away. Howl's Moving Castle has worked its charm on me as well: a floatingly delightful fairytale with its heart set on repealing the law of gravity.The film is based on a book by someone called Diana Wynne Jones, I notice, surely a relative of Delia's chain smoking spouse, Michael?
Labels: Movies
Fake Critic
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Johnny Depp
I made a decision that I would only do the things that I wanted to, that I found interesting and thought I could bring something to. It's still shocking to me that I can work.
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Why are the movies so bad?
This is one of the angriest rants against business-as-usual in the film industry ever written - and one of the most lethally accurate, I always believed, since it stemmed from Kael's experience in working as a kind of senior development executive at Paramount Pictures. Her piece was seen at the time as a kind of obituary for the golden era of expressionism American movies had enjoyed from the late '60s to mid '70s, which was pretty much killed off by the marketing revolution brought about by the wide release of Jaws in 1975 and the growing corporate influence upon the filmmaking process that followed.
Labels: Movies
Spike Lee Interview
I still think that until this country deals with slavery it's never going to get to the place where it needs to be. There's great trepidation on both sides, black and white, to deal with slavery. There's guilt, blame, shame, everything. People like to forget about it like it never happened.
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You Gotta Have It
As a new biography of Spike Lee is published, Francine Stock discusses the career of the African American film-maker with Kaleem Aftab, author of the biography, and to Gaylene Gould of the British Film Institute.
Labels: Movies
Thumbs Up
Pulitzer Prize-winning film critic Roger Ebert might not be a movie star but his work has been so memorable that he has earned his own star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Ebert was named the Chicago Sun-Times film critic six months after joining the paper in 1966. In 1975, he became the first film critic to receive a Pulitzer prize for arts criticism.
Labels: Movies
Pixar playing with fire
Generally it's very funny, but one part of it is quite disturbing where the baby bursts into a ball of flames. It happens several times - and I discovered on the web that there's a name for this, Pyrokinesis - but as I watched it I couldn't help think about Jamie Bulger and Child's Play 3, the video (they say) influenced the two children who murdered him.
I wondered what Oscar was thinking while watching this, and could imagine him setting fire to dolls as a result if he could get hold of matches (especially since his father was something of a well-known pyromaniac in younger years).
I also wondered if Pixar have thought of this - perhaps it was the reason the scene got pulled from the film. I'm surprised that they would want to risk it at all, anywhere. All it would take is one incident for the media to be able to whip up some pretty bad PR around their wholesome product.
Labels: Movies
Tribute to Tokyo Story
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The Art of the Trailer
"Trailers are full of deception because what they want you to do is to see the movie they want you to see, not the movie that it is. The only way to see the movie that it is is to go see the movie."
Labels: Movies
Lost in Translation
If there's any justice in Middle Earth then the hobbits should have spared at least one Oscar for Lost in Translation, which was nominated for Best Picture, Best Actor, and Best Director. It's disrespectful to call Sofia Coppola's surprise hit a romantic comedy; it's sophisticated, moving and thoughtful in a way that's far beyond the usual Hollywood dross. It would be inaccurate too, since the romance is uncertain and the comedy somewhat secondary.
Bill Murray plays Bob Harris, an ageing Hollywood actor filming a lucrative whisky commercial in Japan (as many stars have secretly done before - check out japander.com for a laugh). As we see Bob tiredly discussing carpet and wallpaper with his wife back in the States, we realise he is also stuck in a marriage that's lost its spark.
Jetlagged and drowning his sorrows in the hotel bar, Bob falls into conversation with sensitive young philosophy graduate Charlotte (Scarlet Johansson). Neglected by her photographer husband, she passes the time listening to self-help CDs in her room and wondering what she wants out of life.
Both are at personal crossroads and feeling lost in different ways, but over several days together affection develops as they help each other pass the time.
Japan provides the perfect backdrop for the story. Not only is it culturally both familiar and baffling in a way that mirrors the characters' inner confusions, but their excursions into the frantic, neon nightscape of Tokyo are a rich source of humour, too.
We see Bob undergoing the humiliation of a Banzai-style game show, grappling with the intricacies of Japanese cuisine ("What kind of restaurant is it that makes you cook your own food?") and bewildered by a prostitute with poor pronunciation ("Lip my stockings, Mr Bob-san, lip them!").
The filming of the whisky ad is perhaps the funniest scene. The crazed director harasses Bob at length in Japanese, intent that he evoke Roger Moore's 007 and sip his whisky with ever more ridiculous intensity. Bob just wishes it were real whisky; Bill Murray's trademark weariness has never been more effective. (Coppola reputedly stalked him for a year to make the film and wouldn't have done it had he declined.)
I won't reveal what happens between Charlotte and Bob, but US critic Roger Ebert points out: "Lost in Translation is too smart and thoughtful to be the kind of movie where they go to bed and we're supposed to accept that as the answer".
This film doesn't try to provide answers. After all, life has no easy answers to these kinds of feelings either, and this is perhaps why so many people seem to identify with this film.
At some time or another everyone feels like Bob and Charlotte -- wondering who they are and what it all means -- but what Lost in Translation makes you celebrate are the unexpected connections with people along the way that change you and help you get a little bit closer to working it all out.
Labels: Movies
The Assassination of Richard Nixon
The mention of the assassination is misleading; it happens in a haphazard way near the end of the film, and up to that point Richard Nixon is a metaphorical device, representing the broken promises, distrust and lies in Sam's paranoid mind, only eventually becoming a focus for his action.
The plot is really the gradual dismantling of Sam's life. His wife is involved with another man, his kids are distant, he fails at his job and his loan is turned down. All this time, Sam is gradually coming apart; Sean Penn plays the first part of the film like a man who's physically struggling to hold it together, visibly taut with the effort. A pivotal point in the film, which Sean Penn delivers with incredible intensity, is a late night phone call answered by his wife's lover, which ends with Sam begging for contact as she hangs up. From this point onwards, Sam spirals out of control towards a pathetic and typically inept end.
It's harrowing but engrossing viewing. If you've seen Falling Down and remember the man outside the bank telling the world that he's not economically viable, this film could be the story of that man. (N.B. The film is inspired by real events; read about the real Sam Bick).
Labels: Movies
Magic Roundabout
The main problem of the film is the lack of initial scene setting. The basic plot is that the Zebedee alter-ego escapes imprisonment of many years and unleashes all kinds of naughtiness on the world. Gang have save the day. It's a familiar device, but while the grown-ups might understand all the 70's characters, they're just as baffled as the kids as to why Zeebad has this grudge.
It's shakey ground for what follows, which is a series of disjointed chase and action scenes interspersed with some weird song set-pieces which serve only to crowbar in tunes for the 30-somethings ('Mr Blue Sky' by ELO was the highlight).
This film tries, as do most kids films these days, to please about three different target audiences on the instruction of the marketing executives, but the mess they end up with doesn't pull it off. The kids miss most of the trippiness and hippy characterisation of the original, but didn't seem to have anything else to replace it with but strange events happening to unexplained characters.
Oscar spent the last 15 minutes of the film shouting 'I want to go home'. I was thinking the same.
Labels: Movies
Ossie Davis
Da Mayor: Doctor...Ossie Davis died today. I knew he was a great actor from all the Spike Lee joints, but it was only from reading up for the trip to New York last year that he was a lot more besides - writer, director, civil rights activist and friend of Malcolm X; a true (Harlem) rennaissance man.
Mookie: C'mon, what. What?
Da Mayor: Always do the right thing.
I'll remember him best for two roles - Da Mayor in Do the Right Thing, opposite his wife Ruby Dee as Mother Sister, and in Get on the Bus as Jeremiah , the old man taking one last trip on the Million Man March before he dies.
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